As Sadf placed the coffee mug in front of Anwar, she took a deep breath and sat down on the sofa.
“Aren’t you having coffee?” Anwar was quite surprised to see Sadf sitting there with her hands folded, as she loved coffee.
“I’m not in the mood for coffee,” Sadf replied in a weary tone and paused before saying anything further.
“Aren’t Zubair and Suhail home?” he asked to divert Sadf’s attention.
“No, they both went to a friend’s house,” Sadf answered, still sounding disinterested.
Anwar didn’t like the quiet atmosphere, so he started to think about going outside. But Sadf certainly wasn’t going to let him go out. She began to dwell on old stories, past arguments, and memories. Sometimes, these discussions annoyed Anwar. He tried to explain things to her, but she wasn’t in a mood to understand. She kept rambling on, and Anwar patiently tried to reason with her. Then he quietly listened.
Zarina Begum and Nizam Ahmed were blessed by Allah with a son and a daughter. The elder daughter was named Rubina by Zarina Begum, while Nizam Sahib named their son Anwar, who was seven years younger than Rubina. Anwar was born after many prayers. Zarina Begum passed away shortly after Anwar’s marriage. Anwar’s father had passed away twelve years before his marriage. Now, the household consisted of Sadf, Anwar, and their children.
Rubina Apa was an ordinary homemaker. She was always busy with her responsibilities. Sometimes, she would come over to her brother Anwar out of affection, which upset Sadf greatly. However, she couldn’t say anything in front of everyone, so she remained silent. But Rubina’s visits troubled Sadf. Later, when Rubina left, Sadf would criticize her and speak ill of her to Anwar. Anwar would try to explain things to her in any way he could.
After many days, Rubina Apa came to visit Sadf and Anwar. During this time, Sadf’s sister Safina was also visiting. The month of Ramadan had begun. One day, Safina broke her fast without any illness or trouble, and Rubina Apa scolded her with a barrage of advice. She gave her a good telling-off.
“Safina, it was not right for you to break your fast. You are not even sick. Yet, you have committed this sin.”
Rubina Apa kept saying this, and Sadaf’s anger was reaching new heights. When she saw that Rubina Apa was not stopping at all, she interjected, “What do you know about how much fever she has?”
“Oh! Are you saying that, Sadaf? What I mean is that a little fever is not enough to break a fast.” She was saying more, but Sadaf left after saying her piece.
A few days later, just before Eid, Rubina Apa went to her in-laws. Safina was still with her sister. One day, Sadaf gave Anwar a piece of her mind. She started cursing Anwar’s entire lineage, “He left nothing for us. He gave everything in his daughters’ names. And here we are, in a state of starvation.”
Hearing her pointless complaints, Anwar sat down, holding his head.
Arranging a gift for Safina’s wedding became a huge problem for Sadaf. Big Apa was giving a nice gold set. Uncle and Aunt were also giving a lot as gifts. All the relatives were contributing something. In this situation, Sadaf had nothing to give. What she had was neither valuable nor trendy. This became a source of embarrassment for her. When she mentioned it to Anwar, he said, “You have decent jewelry, just give her some of that.” Hearing Anwar’s words made her even more upset.
“What kind of talk is this? Safina has seen all the jewelry I have. If I give her old jewelry, what will she think? That Apa gave her old jewelry.”
After much back and forth, Anwar had to agree to her request. He gave Sadaf the money meant for the flat installment to buy jewelry for her sister Safina. Anwar had a good record of paying installments on time. He used to deposit the installment every month punctually. Therefore, the bank forgave him this month, and things worked out somewhat. But Sadaf didn’t care; she was only interested in the money she received.
One day, a fight broke out at home. Sadaf started bringing up old grievances again. Anwar’s patience ran out, and he began to respond. Just then, there was a knock at the door. Suhail went to open the gate.
“Please, everyone, adjust your mood,” said thirteen-year-old Jubair, who was sitting nearby, engrossed in his game.
Anwar suddenly felt embarrassed. Memories of his childhood, youth, and the peaceful atmosphere of his parents’ home flooded back to him. A pang of regret stirred in his heart.
Anwar began to think to himself, what am I giving to my children? He could hear the voices of Rubina Apa and her husband Riaz Bhai from outside. Anwar quickly stepped out. He greeted Riaz Bhai and brought him inside.
Riaz Bhai began to explain, “Actually, we went to meet Sameera. Sameera’s mother-in-law has gone to stay with her elder son. And Sameera had a sprain in her leg, so we came to see her. Her house is quite close to yours, so we thought we would drop by your place as well. We came without informing you.” Riaz Bhai said as he sat down on the sofa.
“No problem, Riaz Bhai, it’s great that you came here. This is your home too. ThereтАЩs no need to inform us,” Anwar replied with a smile.
Then they got into casual conversations. Sadaf brought tea and sat down to chat with Sameena Apa. For some reason today, she was speaking quite naturally. There was no pretense in her words.
“Anwar, tell me, why couldn’t you pay the installment for your flat this month? DonтАЩt take it the wrong way, but the bank manager keeps coming to me. He mentioned it casually in conversation. Is there some issue?” Riaz Bhai asked.
“Yes, Riaz Bhai, I had some extra expenses last month,” Anwar replied.
Riaz Bhai kept asking what the expenses were, but Anwar remained silent, thinking about the shame it would bring to his family. Riaz Bhai then resumed talking about other things.
After about two hours, Riaz Bhai, along with Rubina Apa, left after giving Anwar some advice. Although Riaz Bhai had left, he had shared a thought that echoed in Anwar’s ears for a long time.
“One can avoid unnecessary expenses only when they keep their desires in check.”
“Yes, Riaz Bhai! You are right, but who can explain this to women like Sadaf, who insists on fulfilling her whims at any cost?” he began to ponder.